Bouquets of Sharpened Pencils

Before I start, I would like to note to anyone who caught the reference in my title, that it is surprising to me how much the movie You've Got Mail has effected my subconscious.

Who knew?

For anyone who doesn't know, I have had a life-long love affair with school supplies. If you're like me you know exactly what I'm talking about. Pencils, pens, pencil bags, CRAYONS, map pencils, highlighters, bottle glue, stick glue, scissors, rulers, protractors, folders, binders, NOTEBOOK PAPER, CONSTRUCTION PAPER, SHARPIES!

Take a minute. Step back. Breathe.

For me, school supplies has always been one of the highlights of the school year. It gives me an excuse to show my Nerdness. Whoops, forgot Play-Doh. Perfectly valid school supply.

I submit, for your consideration, that school supplies have the innate ability to make your day better. Walking down the school supply aisle for me is what walking down the candy aisle is for others. Or the electronics aisle or the toy aisle. I want it ALL! I can spend half an hour deliberating on what kind of folder to purchase. Which crayon box should you get? At least the box with 24. Better yet the box with 64 and the crayon sharpener in the back. And the mysterious Someone who's job is to come up with the names for the colors? I've coveted their position since I was in elementary school.

You can't tell me that a brand spankin' new box of Crayola or those giant packets of Sharpie don't make your blood rush a little faster in your veins. I love the smell of crayons in the morning!

I've also been known to be something of a notebook hoarder. I find notebooks comforting. If you search my house you will probably find close to 10 composition books. Some are empty, some are half filled. Each one has a specific purpose which may or may not end up as it's fate. I have to have a notebook around. I carry one in my purse. Bored? Excited about an idea? Worried about life? Get out the notebook.

When moving out of my parents' house officially I decided to get rid of or give away half of everything in my room. It took several days of cleaning and during that time we found upwards of 20 notebooks that I had kept since my childhood. The interesting thing was that these notebooks were filled with the same kinds of information over and over and over. Lists, house plans, goals, etc. It wasn't the first time I had realized how strange I am but it was kind of shocking to be faced with so much hard evidence of the fact.

It's also a little disturbing to watch the movie Proof and realize that Anthony Hopkins' character, with his mountains of notebooks all over the place, could actually be me someday.

We're all a little OCD right?


This year I missed the school supply rush. I have no excuse to buy a new pack of pencils. I have no reason to purchase a package of notebook paper, no binder to put it in. And while I wouldn't want to walk down the school supply aisle in August anyway (way too crowded) I might mosey on by sometime this week.


You know, just to get my fix.

Dear Starbucks

First of all, I want to say that I've always been a fan, sort of. By sort of I mean that I don't drink nor do I actually know anything about coffee. However, due to Hollywood and movies like You've Got Mail, I've always wanted to be the kind of girl who frequents your doorway and gives off that busy New York Vibe. Though I doubt that ever has or ever will happen, thanks for giving me a dream.

But I also wanted to ask you a favor. I'd like a job. But wait Christine, why are you asking me for a job? Why is someone like you, *educated, funny, beautiful, and interesting*, looking for minimum wage work? (Stop it Starbucks you're making me blush!) I know right? It seems crazy to me too. I don't know why I thought that after I'd spent 4 and a half years getting a degree in Education that I'd be able to find a job no matter where I went. Or why I believed people as a kid, when they said I could be whatever I wanted to be when I grew up.

You see the problem is that I did grow up and I had a teaching job, but alas, we moved. And now there are bills to pay and dogs to feed and all those years I spent working with children aren't valued by other employers. Employers like banks, who prefer that I have lots of sales experience, or even companies looking for administrative assistants. Because everyone knows that teachers don't know anything about getting people to do things they don't want to do, being organized, and keeping up with paperwork.

But not you Starbucks. I know you'll value my ability to greet and help customers with a friendly smile even if I feel like crap. My selfless charm as I not only keep my area clean but also clean up the messes of others. My personal work ethic of making sure that orders get taken care of and everything runs smoothly. My ability to treat each individual as someone with their own problems at home, their own coffee style, their unique gifts they bring to the store every time they want caffeine.

Where did I acquire such awe inspiring powers?
In the classroom.

I have years of customer service experience, I love to help people, and whatever I don't know about coffee I'm pretty sure I can learn. What's that? You're right. No lesson planning or grading or standardized testing. Starbucks, give me a job. Because this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Sincerely,
Me



*Disclaimer*
Of course I don't mean that if you work at Starbucks you aren't educated, funny, beautiful, and interesting. You totally are. Obviously there are a lot of us in the coffee business or looking to get into it. Plus you have that cool vibe I've always wanted and you know coffee so trust me, I want to be you someday. Preferably later this week.

Please Note This Post Has Interactive Links (you should click on them)

Get ready to take offense.

Now that our Brilliant Governor has proclaimed his intentions to be the next Commander in Chief I thought we should take a look at how much he has done for our state during his reign. Since he is so much more eloquent than I let's reference his official website shall we?

"As Americans, we believe freedom is a gift from God, and government’s prime function is to defend it.  We don’t see the role of government as a nanny state, and we recognize there is no government money that wasn’t once earned through the sweat and toil of private citizens."


Ah freedom, let's jump right on that band wagon. I agree with Governor Perry, the government's money once belonged to it's citizens. The question remains however, why are the lower classes, those who earn "through the sweat and toil" taxed more than those who sit in penthouses? (If you doubt it check out page 102 of this report by the Institute on Taxation and Economic Policy). As for the trickle down theory, has anyone felt any drips lately? Certainly not the elderly, who are suffering under the present "leadership". Certainly not teachers, who will have a hard time finding help from the current administration. We seem to have more than one kind of drought to deal with.

That’s why we object to an Administration that sees its role as spending our children’s inheritance on failed economic theories that have given us record debt and left far too many unemployed, threatening not only our economy, but our security. 


I love a good game of pin the tail on the Donkey, it seems the Governor does too. But let's take the blindfold off for a second. There now. Where's the ass?

And yes we all know about his call for a day of prayer and fasting. But golly his timing was spot on! How magnanimous of him to set aside his political aspirations and focus on humbling himself before G-d.

⁵ “And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. ⁶ But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. ⁷ And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. ⁸ Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. 


(In case you didn't catch  that last reference, it was Jesus, Sermon on the Mount, Matthew Chapter 6 in, you know, the Bible)

And I will work every day to make Washington, D.C. as inconsequential in your lives as I can.


I'm sure you will Rick, by redecorating the White House. It's going to be so pretty. I look forward to more national coverage of all your decor decisions on E!

The change we seek will never emanate out of Washington…it must come from the windswept prairies of Middle America…the farms and factories across this great land…the hearts and minds of God-fearing Americans who will not accept a future that is less than our past…who will not be consigned a fate of less freedom in exchange for more government.

I completely and totally agree. That's why I figured out a while ago that a government that wants to keep out of people's personal business should also be one that doesn't get a say in whether or not a woman should or should not have an abortion. Because I'm pretty sure that's about as personal as you can get. NEWSFLASH: Even G-d knows that those choices come from the heart not the state. Whether you agree with it or not isn't the issue. If you want to take a stand against abortion then join an organization that counsels young mothers, or better yet, mentors young fathers. Passing laws to prevent abortion or homosexuality is about as effective as giving Tamiflu to a person who's already got the flu.

Hint: it's still there.

(Please note that I am not trying to suggest that women who have abortions or homosexuals are the same as sick people or diseased in any way. It's just an analogy.)

Over ten years, we have followed this recipe of fiscal restraint to produce the strongest economy in the nation. While millions of jobs have been lost over the last decade nationwide, hundreds of thousands of jobs have been added in Texas. Texas is home to one in 12 Americans, and yet since June of 2009, we have created more than four in ten American jobs.




Wait, hasn't Perry been in office since 2000? So unemployment went up, then down again, and now it's back up during his time there. So what does he have to do with whether or not Texans have jobs? But it's true, we're better off than most. Except for the thousands of teachers and other ISD employees who were cut.

Gov. Rick Perry has said that the best way to balance the budget is to make cuts instead of increasing taxes for already strapped families. He has said that the budget hole can be overcome by setting priorities, such as school districts doing more with less or by sharing services.

There's a fine line between more with less and just less with less. We'll see how this year goes.

And please let's not forget the sweeping textbook changes that were made in 2010 under Perry. Because free enterprise sounds much better than capitalism and kids really don't need to learn about the importance of Thomas Jefferson. Now every student in Texas and thousands throughout the nation will be learning the good American value of "putting a spin on it".

We will not sit back and accept our current misery…because a great country requires a better direction…because a renewed nation requires a new president.  That’s why, with faith in God, the support of my family, and an unwavering belief in the goodness of America, I am a candidate for President of the United States.

Just a few months ago, our Governor suggested that we secede the Union. Perhaps if he can just gain control of the government he so obviously hates, distrusts, and finds useless, we won't have to.

If you vote for Perry you're only doing it because you hate Obama, or you're against homosexuality and abortion, or maybe because he prayed in public the other day. Certainly not because you believe in education,
or you're against corruption, or because you think the middle and lower classes deserve a fighting chance. I'm not saying any other candidate will do a better job. Being President means that you get blamed for everything, whether it's war, natural disaster relief, or debt. Even if the problems were handed to you by another administration. He is a politician just like all the rest. Please, before you vote, look at what he's done in our state and think about what it could mean for our nation if he gets into Office.

Don't Listen to Yourself

If there's one thing I know about myself it's that I'm a worrier. (Wait, have I mentioned that?) It's also really hard for me to come out of a funk once I fall in. When depressing, or I should say despairing thoughts take hold, I find them difficult to shake loose. Take my job situation for example.

I don't have one.

Having been married for just over 2 months now and having lived in the big city for almost as long, I have been searching, and searching, and searching for work. I'm OCD about checking job search engines. I'm sick of applying, sicker still of seeing my options disappear.

It's not just about the financial strain, though G-d knows it's a factor. It's the not having a purpose for my day part. Or the part about not leaving the house and staying in my pjs all the time. Each day is a repeat of the day before. Each day my confidence takes a hit. Each day brings me closer to the fear of something really bad happening if I don't find something soon. Or worse, I will settle for something that kills my soul but pays the bills. And every offer of "Don't worry, something will turn up, G-d has a plan" starts to sound like some trite solution the Employed offer to the Unemployed when things get uncomfortable. (No offense meant to the dear friends who have been trying to encourage me.)

On top of all this I am alone for most of the day. Zach is working, in a great job which (thankfully) he really enjoys. And I am so, so very happy for him. But that leaves me alone with my darkest thoughts for the majority of my time. So here's another tip. One that I tell myself over and over.


Get out of your own head.


It can be a very dangerous place to be. I, and many others, have been known to dwell there for weeks on end. It's very lonely, very grim, and very frightening. When you give into panicked emotions you are not thinking clearly so best to just get out of there.

People tend to shut others out at times like this. I know I do.

Don't.

Whatever your situation, whatever you are facing, whatever ugly ending is scaring you shitless, don't face it alone. Get out of your head, your house, and have a good conversation with someone. Watch a movie at a friend's. Cook dinner together. Don't give into the feeling that you just want to be left alone or you're not up for it.

Get up for it.

Literally out of bed, out of pjs, out the door. (But replacing pjs with clothes please.)

If nothing else, watch a Disney movie. As a friend once told me, you can't be down when you're watching a Disney movie. After all...

Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come shining through
No matter how your heart is grieving,
If you keep on dreameeming*
The dreams that you wish
Will...come...true....


*new translation courtesy of 2 year old me*

Number 3

I don't know about you, but I sometimes find it very easy to get bogged down in the monotony of life. Whether it's housework (will laundry and dishes never cease?) or problems at work, or not being able to have the life you want right now.

It can get frustrating.

 When I was teaching this last year things just got harder and harder. Students, grading, tests, pressure, and worry, all the time worry, about our jobs, budgets, and changes. It was my second year teaching and the first year had been hard. They tell you to expect it. I never went into this profession with my eyes closed but it's hard to keep your heart open when you keep getting beat down.

There was one thing that helped me during my first year and that was going to workshops. To be honest I would schedule them once a month if possible, to give my self a break and to wash my brain with new ideas, to talk to the workshop leaders, ask questions, and remember why I had chosen to do this in the first place. My second year of teaching I was told that I couldn't go to anymore workshops because they weren't in the budget anymore. I felt stagnated.

Here's your third tip:

Whatever you want to become in your life, find someone who's already doing it and build that relationship. Those that burn together burn brighter. 

You know the feeling you get when you have a really good conversation with a person you just met and that conversation made you feel like you were not alone? Your blood pumping a little harder because you felt the sky open up and whatever oppression (or depression) you were feeling lifted? And you can't stop smiling, you drive a little faster, you can't get your brain to shut up. And it's not even about networking anymore, it's about you just met someone who happens to be the person you want to be when you grow up.

If you haven't found anyone like that yet keep your eyes open. If you pay attention you could find them anywhere, in moments of opportunity, enough light to take your next step.






photo credits go to  http://getyourbizsavvy.com/2010/04/how-to-find-a-mentor/ with an excellent article on how to find a mentor for business people. it's true for life as well.

The Next Good Idea

The next good idea is the "6 Month Theory".

Most of the challenges, questions, doubts, concerns, and changes you are facing right now will be resolved, answered, and over within the next 6 Months.

In other words: In 6 months, you'll know.

I spend a lot of my time worrying about a lot of my life. From jobs, to health, to money trouble, you name it I worry. But I realize that whatever it is that's totally throwing my world off-kilter right now will, in 6 months, be in my past and I'll have a whole new "normal" (which of course means I'll be so busy worrying about XYZ that I'll have forgotten all about ABC.)

Now I realize that there are certain things that happen in our lives that will irrevocably change us, like the death of a loved one or something of that nature. Things like that can never feel normal, it's not something you "get over" nor should it be. But you will make it through. You will.

So if you're going through something stressful right now, let me encourage you that in 6 months you'll know how it all turns out. You just don't know right now. And that's okay.

And remember, when I write this I'm mostly just reminding myself.

Disclaimer: There are certain situations that do not fall under the 6 Month Rule because they are on a different time schedule. Things like having a baby etc. We know. Just wanted to clarify that for all the smart-asses out there.

Rules to Live By

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense. - Buddha

One of the unique things about your 20s: that is the decade when most of us decide how we will live our lives. Being a teenager is fraught with drama and misunderstanding. Anything can be everything by which I mean whatever you're stuck on at the moment (whether it's a boy, a problem with friends, or your grades/tryouts etc) is everything to you. There is nothing else.

As if that wasn't bad enough, then you go to college. Which is fun but you begin to realize that you have to start making some decisions about how to spend your time, who to spend it with, and (slightly more important) how to get and spend money. Ay there's the rub.

By the time you graduate (which is now typically 4.5-6 years later) you've lost the padding of a college class schedule and not only are there bills there are Loans to be paid. Loans with a capital L.

On top of all this you're still trying to figure out who you are, what you want to do with your life (and now the new question, what you can you do with your life and actually get paid for it) who to fall in love with, where to live and on and on and on. Try googling this topic (see Title above) and you'll get thousands of hits from funny to bucket lists you name it. Everybody has ideas on how to have the life they want.

An interesting piece of advice was given to me when I was twenty, that I should not get married until I'm 25 because you don't really know who you are until you are 25.

Well I got married (very happily so) at 25 and I think they were right, I do know who I am. I may not have figured out what I'm going to do with my life, but I have figured out certain truths or, let's just say they're "Really Good Ideas" about how to live my life.

And since everybody else is or will soon be in the same boat (you know, the one with all the giant question marks) I figured I'd share these ideas with you and see what you think. They vary from the seemingly ordinary to the big life affirming kind of ideas but I think you'll find them all to be, as I said, really good.

Remember these are just guidelines and remember what Buddha said. We'll start with seemingly ordinary:

Wherever you go, always bring a book and a sweater. Because you never know when it's going to be cold... or boring.

Memorize it, memorize it, memorize it, it's one of the truest things I've ever told anybody.

This phrase (that I made up myself) has proven to be some of the best advice I have ever given to me. The other day I put my library book in my purse and sure enough, I found myself caught in a boring situation so I whipped it out and continued reading. Alas, I did not heed all of it and was shivering in the ridiculous AC this place had because I had left my cardigan behind. Other times I'm comfy cozy but bored to tears having forgotten my book. If you had to your smart phone would, I suppose, work in a pinch but I prefer books.

The point being before you walk out the door, no matter where you're going, make sure you have a book (check) and a jacket (check). Try this for a week or so and see if it doesn't prove to be true.

Just use your best judgement and don't read just because you're bored, a lot of things can be really boring. Especially if you're still in high school or college. Trust me, professors and teachers like to think you're listening and (voice of experience) reading a book under your desk does not give this impression.

More "Really Good Ideas" to follow.

If you have any guidelines of your own leave a comment and let me know what they are!