What I’ve Learned from Jack Sparrow (No, really)

Wherever we want to go, we'll go. That's what a ship is, you know. It's not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails, that's what a ship needs but what a ship is... what the Black Pearl really is... is freedom. – Jack Sparrow

                               
                                  (Sidenote: Clicking on any of the pictures in this post will bring you to their original source, and some really good reads.)


It’s no secret Zach and I are into alternative ideas when it comes to living. We grow our own veggies in containers, we collect rainwater, we dream of someday living in a house under 800 square feet that we built ourselves, using reclaimed materials and perhaps straw bales. Most recently, and by recently I mean yesterday, Zach really wants to raise chickens. (I reminded him we need to take baby steps.)

Basically we’re hippies, but only in an environmentally friendly, non-consumeristic, “let it be” kind of way.

I’ve been following the tiny house movement for years, since I was in high school. The interesting thing about tiny houses (or small dwellings in general) is how hard it can be to obtain one, and I don’t mean the cost. I’m talking about the red tape.

There are many reasons to build small and I’ll probably explore them in another post someday. There are several companies who build beautiful small structures. There’s an entire philosophy behind the tiny house movement and the reclaimed materials movement (and both complement each other extremely well) so it’s worth exploring for yourself. But what stops many people joining in?

Zoning.

                        

In the 1950s, the average house size was around 900 square feet. Many people would balk at that kind of size for a house but think again. I’ve lived in some very nice 900 square foot houses, very comfortably. Most people live in the same amount of space right now. It’s called an apartment. However, few people dream of building an apartment sized house. Houses are supposed to be big, open, expensive. Houses are supposed to mean that you’ve arrived, you own your home, you can join the ranks of successful Americans who are living the dream.

The average house size today is somewhere between 2,400 and 2,500 square feet. Yes, that’s more than twice what it was in 1950.



Two questions for you:

Do we really need that much space?

What about the people who are less interested in arriving and more interested in becoming?

Think carefully.

Tiny/small houses are not for everyone. But zoning laws in most states force everyone to build huge if they want to own their own house. It’s not constitutional, and the reasons behind it are strictly mercenary. Bigger houses means more money for a lot of people. Not homeowners, other people.

Even if you dream of owning a huge house someday (and you have every right to) wouldn’t you agree that those of us interested in owning a home under 1,000 square feet should have that right as well? That the only say in your house the government should have is to make sure it’s structurally sound, not dictate how large it should be?

Building a tiny house should be a viable option, just like starting your own small business is. It takes work, and you’re not in it for “The Man”, you’re doing it for yourself. You have the freedom to do it, and it gives you freedom in return, to live the life you want. Life on your terms. (That’s where the Jack Sparrow quote comes in. Wherever we want to go, we'll go. That's what a tiny house is, you know. It's not just a roof and a floor and windows and walls , that's what a house needs but what a house is... what a tiny house really is... is freedom.)

                            

Tiny houses and small dwellings are not shacks. Most of them are beautiful, hand crafted, intentional homes built by people who want to live out their ideals.

                          

There is a petition to get the federal government to reform the zoning laws and allow homes under 1000 ft. to be built. In this economy, it could potentially help a lot of people live their dreams.

http://wh.gov/nBE

Please follow through to the petition and sign. Tell your friends, link to this post, get the word out. And while you’re at it, if you’ve never paid attention before, check out the tiny house movement. Google it. You might be surprised, and inspired, by all the things you find.

Guidelines for Holi Virgins

Today is the Holi Festival in India and all over the world. Holi, otherwise known as the Festival of Colors, is a Hindu festival celebrating the coming of Spring and the triumph of Good over Evil. It is celebrated by people throwing brightly colored powders and paints on each other and dancing. Generally all around good fun! (Did I mention there are water guns?)

My friend Becca and I went to a Holi celebration this past Saturday and had the time of our lives! If you've never been to Holi but you get the chance to go (major US cities with higher Indian populations will likely have celebrations) here are a few tips:

1. Wear as much white as possible, at least a white shirt. Whatever the color of your clothes, make sure you don’t care about them at all and plan on their being destroyed.

2. Leave jewelry at home, it won’t hurt them but I’d just rather not have to deal with it. DO bring sunglasses (I wish I had). Leave your bags in the car. Just bring some cash, your keys, and a picture taking device in your pockets.

3. Bring a towel for the ride home. (Hitchhiker’s is still right about this one.)

4. It doesn’t matter what age you are, where you come from, or what you look like, everyone is welcome. Unless you don’t intend to throw colors or dance. Then I’m not sure why you came and you’d be better off at home.

5. Hydrate.

6. Once you have your color throw it at anyone and everyone in a spirit of fun and community. Don’t forget to say “Happy Holi!”

7. DON’T throw colors in people’s face. Rub it on their face and in their hair with your fingers. I asked a girl who had yellow (a color I didn’t have “on” yet) if she would rub some on my face. She said sure and threw a handful in my face before I knew it. I guess I should have made myself clearer.

Like this. 

8. Try to keep your mouth shut as much as possible because the powder does get into your teeth and you’ll be spitting colors for a while. Also keep your eyes closed because it’s very uncomfortable getting it in your eyes (as when the girl threw it in my face). This is where sunglasses come in handy.

9. Dance. No one cares. Seriously. Just do what everyone else is doing (or channel your favorite Bollywood star) and have a good time.

10. Make new friends. Talk to strangers. Act the fool. It will be worth it and you will always remember it!

If I were really cool I would make one of those things they have on Pinterest but since I’m pretty thoroughly uncool I’ll just say it here:

What I think I look like on Holi:



What I actually look like:


                         



picture
picture this link has some amazing photos of Holi!
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For more photos of Holi just type "holi" into google and search images. You'll get the general idea. And for anyone who is wondering, yes, going to Holi for me (as a Bollywood fan) was like a nerdy kid going to a Star Wars convention. Best Day Ever!

Sip sip

In order for me to tell you the thought that occurred to me first I have to tell you a story.

The semester before Zach and I started dating he lived with 2 other guys in the dorms of his college campus (mind you it was a 2 person dorm, which meant one of them was sleeping on the floor). At the end of that semester between the three of them they had earned all of 6 credit hours.

Stop, think, do the math. Okay.*

The other night when we were talking about this he mentioned one of his roommates (an art major) did however manage to pull through with a 4.0, due to his dropping every class except sculpting and then acing it.

That’s when I made the flippant remark that the 4.0 shouldn’t really count because he was just an art student and the other two had real classes to go to (if only they had**).

About five seconds later I realized what I had just said. I never think I’m a judgmental person until I catch myself doing it (more than I like to admit). I never think the biases of society pertain to me until I find myself acting exactly as expected.

Oh no, not I. I’m above those sorts of things. I have an open mind. I watch documentaries. I read more books than I watch television shows. I don’t even HAVE a television I have a library card! I didn’t drink the Kool-Aid I just took a few sips. (What? It was red!)

But when did being an artist become a stupid, non-realistic, career only slackers try for? When did doing something as incredibly brave and challenging as creating put someone else lower on the food chain and allow the rest of us to feel entitled because at least we weren’t doing that?

So in the few seconds it took me to run through a much less elaborate analysis of my own bias I spoke up. “Actually I take it back,” I said, “I think maybe we’ve got it backwards. Because the rest of us were just sitting around in classes listening to lectures for the most part and making presentations of information we found in books. While art students were actually creating something. They had to come up with something on their own, work on it every day, and it had to be good and not just a copy. What they do is actually a lot harder.”

Zach thought about it. “Yeah, that’s true.”

                 

When I was a kid the first thing I remember wanting to be was an artist, or at the very least the person who gets to name the crayon colors. Somewhere along the way I gave up that dream for a more familiar path. I’m not saying I was meant to be a great painter. But if I had unknowingly allowed that prejudice to filter into my brain, what other areas of life might it be influencing? How I view other people? My students? Myself?

I mean, who wants to raise their hand and say “No I’m not creative and I look down on those who are.” Even if you don’t see yourself as creative don’t you still want to be?

And just in case, while we’re on the subject, have you been sipping the Kool-Aid too?

Think about it.


 picture

*This is my sneaky teacher side tricking you into doing a word problem muahaha.
**I would like to point out that Zach didn’t miss a single class the entire last two years he was in college. And it wasn’t because of me either it was because he decided to do something about it.

Control Part 2

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the issue of birth control, and since I’ve written about it before and my apprehensions about using it I thought I might do a follow up.

Spoiler alert: To any guys reading this the words “uterus” and “period” will probably show up at some point so if you, like my husband, seek to deny the occurrence of the phenomenon known as a woman’s “time of the month” because you think it’s gross I suggest you go elsewhere.

But seriously.

I’ve been on birth control now for about a year and it has been an interesting year. It’s amazing to me how when I was younger and I first started my period I was so excited and then as the months went by I came to dread it because of the cramps. Something about the ripping of the uterine lining just does not comfort the soul. Pretty much I knew that for the first day or two of my period I was going to feel like absolute shite. Not to mention the PMS beforehand.

(See this is me doing my best to scare away all the boys.)

All that changes when you start having sex. Actually that’s not quite right. It doesn’t change, you still feel awful, what changes is that, unless you’re wanting to get pregnant, when cramps come you welcome it. Before I was sexually active I would beg God and pain killers to make it go away. Then I started having sex and worried that somehow it wouldn't work and I'd end up pregnant anyway. Did it stop me from having sex? Um, no. But every month when I knew I was due to start I would wait, I would worry, I would pray. It took me a long time to trust my birth control. In fact there were a couple of occasions when I was stressed, which delayed my period because stress does that, but it only serves to freak you out even more which, you guessed it, delays your period.

Oy vey.

(I have since reminded myself every month if I start to freak out thinking I won’t start my period and that I am in fact pregnant it’s probably a good sign of PMS and Aunt Flo is about to come to town. Cheers me right up.)


                    

A lot of people seem to be talking about birth control and women’s rights and trying to make it an issue (see the above picture). Some people think it’s sinful to use birth control and some people think birth control is the savior of womankind. I’m just going to share my experience. Just in case someone reads this who doesn’t know me and writes me off as someone who wants to have free sex without consequences, is unwomanly, or worst case scenario, Going Against God’s Plan. (I thought of something worse actually. What if I were a representative of Planned Parenthood? *cue screams and dramatic music*. j/k, j/k I’m totally not.)

I didn’t have sex until marriage, I waited, I played by the “rules” and was a “good girl”. For the record, it's true, abstinence is the most effective form of birth control. I didn't have any babies. But that doesn't help you much after you get married. So yes, for 25 years I was a virgin. And I’m glad, not because I think it means I’m better than someone who hasn't waited, not even because I think God likes me better for abstaining from sex. I’m glad because I love my husband and can’t imagine being intimate with anyone but him. I’m glad because I remained true to myself and my integrity for the choices I made concerning my life, which to me is a way of honoring God anyway, by being true to myself. If that’s not your choice that’s okay. If you’re uncomfortable with what I just said because you think it’s too conservative or not conservative enough, I applaud you. I only hope you will live your life with the same integrity and respect for yourself that I have. I’m not perfect but I own my choices (or as they say in Hindi films, I take my decisions).

If I waited until marriage to have sex why am I not excited to become a mom right away? I know plenty of other girls I went to school with who have kids already, some are already learning their ABCs. And it’s weird to think that someday my child could be entering school when the kids of my peers are graduating. But it’s okay. They have adorable kids, I will (maybe) have adorable kids*. They just won’t have playdates together. There are a lot of reasons why I’m not ready to be a mom, it’s a personal choice for each woman, each couple, each family. One day there may be a lot of reasons why I’m ready to have a baby. That day and this day are both good days.

Here’s the thing about birth control: I’m glad it’s available. I think that women who never want to use it are awesome. Some women want to be mothers more than anything and that is amazing and important. Some women never want to have kids and they are just as fully beautiful and womanly as every other woman. And some, like me, think that someday it would be wonderful to be a mom but not today. Not anytime soon. When I decide I’m ready to commit to that relationship I’ll do it. But not today. Not anytime soon.

As a friend once said, one can never over-think a life changing event such as having a child. Whatever your decision is take it, own it, and be thankful you live in a country that allows you to say yes, no, or…maybe.


*Of course if we decide to have kids they will be adorable. (Zach is quite the looker if I do say so myself.) The “maybe” here refers to our current indecision on the subject of parenthood.

Because Wikipedia is Written by Random People Whose Judgment Can’t Be Trusted

For the past month I’ve been studying for the big test I have to take next week(for extra teacher certification). Basically it’s reviewing everything you learned in grade school and how to teach it. Kind of like “Are you smarter than a 6th grader? Great! We’ll give you a classroom.”

So each of the major subjects are addressed in this textbook I’m renting. And it took me about 5 days to get through the Social Studies section, because it gives you a basic rundown of the history of the world, government, economics, and geography. Yeah.

But what struck me most as I was reading this chapter were the errors I was finding. This book, which is an official study reference written by two people (professors?) from the University of Houston had the following things to say. These are isolated incidences, so they will be typed verbatim but out of context. Since you already know the context is a chapter on Social Studies, it doesn’t matter. My thoughts will be written in underneath. (If it’s bold it’s a vocabulary word in the book.)

“In World War II, the Allies (France, the former USSR, Great Britain, and many others) fought against the Axis (Germany, Italy, Austria, and Japan)…”


As far as I can remember, Austria wasn’t officially a part of “The Axis”. Yes, it was invaded (“annexed”) by Germany and had a high concentration of Nazis stationed there, but if this is what you’re basing your point on you need to include Poland and France and a bunch of others so they don’t feel left out. And if I were Austrian, I’d be ticked off at this accusation, especially if I knew for a fact that my forefathers were singing “Edelweiss” with the Von Trapp family, and totally had nothing to do with being buddy buddy with Nazis. (I know that a lot of Austrians were pro-Nazi, but that doesn’t mean there wasn’t resistance, or that they didn’t have to kill a bunch of Austrian leaders to get in. And if that’s not an invasion then I don’t know what is.)


“Passover is a Jewish holiday commemorating the Exodus of the Jewish people from slavery in Egypt. The Jews left so quickly after their release from pharaoh that they did not even wait for their bread to rise. In remembrance, Jewish people avoid eating grain products and leavened bread products during this time.”


“Damnit Samuel I said LEAVE the bread! We don’t have time! Just grab the goats and run! Quick, before they change their minds!”

“By the sixth grade, students should be able to locate the following countries on a map of the world: Canada, Mexico, France, Germany, Great Britain, Italy, Spain, Norway, Sweden, Russia, South Africa, Nigeria, Iraq, Iran, India, Pakistan, the Peoples’ Republic of China, The Republic of China (Taiwan), Japan, North Korea, South Korea, Indonesia, and Australia.”


Did anyone else catch that the only 2 African countries listed were South Africa (NOT hard to find at all) and Nigeria? Why Nigeria? Egypt isn’t even mentioned. No countries from South America are included. Russia is the top of Asia, Canada and Mexico are the top and bottom of North America respectively, Australia is both a continent and a country. Afghanistan isn’t on the list but Nigeria is included. Again, why? (Why shouldn’t all the countries be included? Too hard for kids or just sticking to the standards?)

Renewable resources are those that can be replaced in the foreseeable future. For example, forests can be replanted after trees are cut, and a water supply in a certain area is replenished by rain.


I had no idea that water is a renewable resource. I guess I should have figured it out on my own, seeing as how every time I flush the toilet it fills back up with clean water.

Am I being picky? Perhaps. I just think it’s interesting that with math and science, writing and reading, you stick with facts. There are rules, there are guidelines, there is research. Social Studies is completely dependent on who is doing the talking. Whether it’s history, the environment, culture, or what’s important to know, it all depends on your point of view. Your perspective of the world shapes not just your beliefs but also how you evaluate other people, situations, even facts.

                     

Maybe you think that none of the above mistakes are important. But if your country was invaded, would you want it listed with those who did the invading? I’m pretty sure the meaning of Passover is important to practicing Jews, all the countries in the world are important in determining the direction of our world, and people who’s lakes have dried up over the past few months care about water conservation. Not taking the time to fully understand something builds up over time. It starts when we’re children and a grown up tells us something or we read it in a book. Maybe we don't bother to know anything about another group because we were taught to disregard their strange ways, because they aren't relevant to our way of life, or they were
"evil". That belief becomes part of us until we become something…quite possibly something ugly. Something that represses and dismisses. Something that stifles and resists. Something that willfully misunderstands and hates.

         

                         

I'm not trying to target a specific group. I'm just using these as an example of seeds that were planted long ago. It doesn’t matter what religion, race, class, or party you belong to. This type of behavior is present in all of them and all of us if we let it. We may not think we're anything like the people who do those things but we could be under the right circumstances. Shouldn't we try to understand all sides? Don’t we, especially educators and textbook publishers, have a responsibility to teach kids to question, research, understand, and evaluate? Shouldn’t we be making decisions based on what is best for not only ourselves, but also those on the other side, even the ones we don’t understand? Even the ones we may hate? And not just for right now but for the long haul?

Everyone has an answer, but does anyone have the heart?

I honestly don’t think this will ever be solved. The only thoughts and actions I can control are my own. And they will not be governed by hate or fear, but by compassion and understanding. That is what I will strive to teach and to live out. Because maybe the next generation will have parents and teachers who teach that everyone, everywhere is important. Maybe families of different faiths will have each other over for dinner and become friends. Maybe we'll stop wasting everything we've been given and start giving this world our best effort. Maybe it will start at the grassroots level and spread until the whole world stops and breathes a sigh of relief.

In the meantime, I hope I pass my test.